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Jack of Hearts

by Garrett Scatterty

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1.
Wisdom Teeth 04:07
What am I doing here? I thought I left this place for good... I swallowed all my fears, But couldn't rid myself of thirst. Another glass of bitterness may be the cure I seek. So, excuse me if I stumble from this growing insobriety. I will try not to mumble through these metaphors and similes, But I can't promise anything I had that dream again, What are you still doing in my head? I tried to stitch you out, And lost the needle in the thread. These open wounds are a recipe for heart disease. So forgive me if I fumble all my broken ideologies I will try not to crumble while you're pulling out my wisdom teeth But I can't promise anything Take it away from me, I can't be trusted anymore Somebody take my keys before I stumble out the door Take it away from me, before I'm face down on the floor I don't want to feel this way anymore through the bottom of a glass I'll keep my eyes on the door Take it away from me, I can't be trusted anymore Somebody take my keys before I stumble out the door Take it away from me, before I'm face down on the floor Somebody take my keys and throw my crutches out the door.
2.
I built these walls out of concrete and steel to hide all that is real I've shown my back so many times, there's nowhere left to turn but to face what lies inside and the memories I've burned it's so cold inside that little hole the flames that once kept us alive have reduced to coals so if you could spare a light or a little fire wood I would try to reignite those flames the best I could But you have long since moved on and I'm still trying to write that song... Where do we go from here, well that I do not know but if we're going to make it up that hill, well we better drop these stones ya it would do us all some good too leave some things behind so only bring what it is you need and toss the rest aside when we finally reach the top you'll see it all so clear that every wrong turn that you made helped to lead you here and when it's time to go back to you valley home maybe then you'll want to settle down and start collecting stones But I have long since moved on and you just want to hear another song... and despite all of my pride and jealousy I'll shine all the light that remains inside of me but you have long since moved on and I... I'm still trying to write that song.
3.
For thirty days and five thousand miles I've been reading between the lines stuck between where I'm going and where I've been and I'm losing track of time Upon my return, I had to make a move to the other side of the road there the grass just seemed a better shade of green maybe there I could learn to let go Slow down Jack of hearts, You ain't running out time as quickly as you think. And if you're trying to find yourself; Don't gaze too long upon the mirror or too deep into your drink. Well I played the fool and went and fell in love with a girl who had made other plans I guess it was fate that this game of give and take would leave me with my head in my hands Slow down Jack of hearts, You ain't running out time as quickly as you think. And if you're trying to find yourself; Don't gaze too long upon the mirror or too deep into your drink. I don't want to think about the lives we could have lead, what I would have done, and should have said... and I don't wanna listen to those thoughts inside my head that keep me holding on to what is dead.
4.
Come Around 04:16
I lie awake in my bed running circles in my head my bones have turned into stone and my blood is molten lead my muscles twitch and shake, I feel like I'm about to break somewhere I lost my keys don't know which door I should take but the answers come in the strangest ways and I can't always find the right words to say but you know, I'm going to try and though it's taken me a while I know that I'm going to come around, someday I'll come around someday. So please beware my friend, I am my own worst enemy and every bridge that I cross seems to burn beneath my feet don't follow me to close if you want to make it home I have a tendency to not know where I'm going but the answers come, in the strangest ways and I can't always find the right words to say... But you know I'm going to try and though it's taken me a while I know that I'm going to come around, someday. I'll come around, someday.
5.
Catch Up 05:10
Give me something to hold on to give me shelter beyond this roof I could string three words together now but would it make it true and if we used words like forever how would we see them through? Give me something to look forward too Tell me something that you know is true If I yelled out what I'm feeling how would it be misconstrued? If I could only figure it all out then I'd know what to do. I could deconstruct myself until the pieces are small enough for you to chew but you're a million miles ahead and I'd be lying if I said; I'll catch up to you. I've been trying and so have you I'd be lying if I said I knew where any of this shit is going now, I aint got a clue but I'll pull myself out of this wreckage somehow before I am consumed I could deconstruct myself until the pieces are small enough for you to chew but you're a million miles ahead and I'd be lying if I said; I'll catch up to you.
6.
Won't Belong 03:41
You stomped out the fire, so don't come crying to me when you get cold. You know, I'm getting tired of reading your apologies through my phone you took what you want from me so pack your things and walk right out the door keep all your sympathy and little souvenirs, you so adore cus I won't be a pawn in somebody else game of chess anymore and I best be moving on, but I gotta get this off my chest before the feeling is gone. empty pack of cigarettes lay around like skeletons and behind the smoke and mirrors I will hide growing weary of your self projections, begging for some kinda of mass affection like every little blue thumbs up is going to save your life I think we need a remedy for all this apathy, something's gotta give. I'm losing grip of all my empathy and honestly, "this ain't no way to live" And I won't be a pawn in somebody else game of chess anymore and I best be moving on, but I gotta get this off my chest before the feeling is gone. It won't be long, and I won't belong.
7.
Twenty hours in tokyo with nothing on his mind but a bowl of ramen and the girl he left behind. she was leaving for a nine hour drive in his big blue van named Georgia but that's a story for another time Sev was sitting in the passenger seat as they were turning east on the highway, and I was headed west and waved one last goodbye Gord was singing on he radio, words that we all know about courage and how it couldn't come at a worse time. We played a couple games of pool behind the statue of liberty which never made much sense to me cus we were in an Irish bar we ran the table until the locals came in and stole the scene with their crazy talking nonsense and giant pupil eyes... Betsy tried real hard to remember all our names o' but she was seeing ghosts and tell apple jokes all night I guess it all just got a little to weird so we disappeared from the madness, left some coins on the table, and slipped into the night We were watching the hockey game on remembrance day in Kelowna at Prospera Place, three rows from the ice. They don't play a lot of hockey in Australia, so when the whistle blew I'd explain the rules, one play at a time. The little boy sitting next to you was too afraid to talk to strangers and all you wanted was to make another friend. I had promised we would see a fight but we didn't but that alright because the Rockets won 5-2 in the end. And oh, we ended up at Sturgeon Hall again, emptying out heads Until it was time to go, Sleeping on an L shaped couch again, laying head to head, the sun was coming up too soon... The sun was coming up too soon with nothing on his mind The sun was coming up too soon Twenty hours in Tokyo with nothing on his mind Twenty hours in tokyo with nothing on his mind The sun was coming up too soon with nothing on my mind... Twenty Hours in Tokyo

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released March 24, 2019

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Garrett Scatterty Kelowna, British Columbia

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